Lost and Found

LOST GORILLA SUIT
Last seen on Rudy Bonaparte with the mouth part of the rubber mask melted onto a meth pipe. If found, please return to Fatty Daddy in space #88.

FOUND HUMONGOUS TENT-SIZED PANTIES
Big enough to fit over the dome on Biosphere 2, probably. Worn but not washed. Constructed of hot-pink trampoline fabric or something very similar. Found in the dirt outside the Silver Bullet the day after it tipped over and Willy and Beulah got hauled away. See Norm in space #81 to identify and claim.

For Sale

DOPE - DOPE - DOPE -DOPE - DOPE - DOPE -DOPE
Whaddaya want? I can get it for you. Pills, powders, rocks, blotters, liquid, whatever, even plant products like weed and 'shrooms. If ain't legal and I don't already got it, I can get it. Any quantity, too. Need enough to get you through the night? No sweat. Gotcha covered. Got your cottonpickin' hands on a shitpile of cash and wanna blow it all in one place? I can take care of you, too. Any substance, any quantity, from nickels on up to pounds. Bills only, no coins. Stop by Speedy's place in the manager's office at Buzzards and let's do business TODAY!

DYNAMITE BLOWOUT SALE
Remove stumps, speedbumps, an abandonded trailer, whatever!
Also GREAT noisemaker for Holiday family get-togethers!
Will liven up ANY gathering, 4X funner than M-80s!
An M-80 is basically a quarter-stick of dynamite.
Therefore, a stick of dynamite is 4X as much fun as an M-80!!!!
FUN - FUN - FUN - FUN - FUN - FUN - FUN - FUN
Head over to ROGELIO'S QUICK-E-MART
for a bundle of DYNAMITE TODAY!
Rogelio's is conveniently located about 500 yards north of Tinbox Acres,
over on the other side of the highway.

Birth Announcements

DORALEE BINKMAN AND MADDOG MONSON
Girl, 7 lbs. 7 oz., November 30, born in space #61 with Doralee's gramma Edna acting as midwife, and her ma Dena standing guard on the porch with a broomstick to shoo Maddog away. Doralee, Dena and Edna named their new little girl Delilah Binkman, nickname Doobie.

ANDY (THE SECURITY GUY) THORNE AND LULU DUPREE
Boy, 11 lbs. 9 oz., November 15, born frank-breech (buttfirst, folded in half) at the real hospital about five miles down the highway, delivered by Dr. Waxman and a bunch of nurses in a actual delivery room. The happy family returned home to space #68 on November 17. Andy and Lulu named their boy Damian Dupree Thorne.

Real Estate and Real Estate By-products

ABANDONED TRAILERS - CHEAP!
Just call the phone number on the Tinbox Acres sign at the top of the driveway.

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