Lost and Found

LOST ENTIRE FLASHING ELECTRIC PARADE
The parade went right by my trailer in the middle of the night and woke me up. When I called 911 on it, the cops showed up but the parade had disappeared. It didn't escape because the trailer park dead-ends at the duckpond. If found, please notify Carl Bailey in space #1 so the charges of filing a false report will be dropped.

FOUND MONSTER TURDS
Could be T-Rex turds, according to Arliss. Anyways, they're already fossilized into rocks. The gigantic rock-hard monster (or T-Rex) turds was found all over our porch after the monster (or T-Rex) tried to eat our trailer. Contact Eddie in space #62 to identify and claim.

For Sale

REAL ACTUAL TYRANNOSAURUS TURDS, CHEAP!
All sizes, shapes and colors. Already fossilized! Fossils is worth something.  Display your T-Rex turd fossils with pride all over your trailer! Set a few on top the TV! Any and all offers considered, but prefer dope deals. Haggle with Arliss in space #62.

++++++MAY MADNESS MONTH AT ROGELIO'S QUICK-E-MART!++++++
                        Buy a Shitload and Save!
Frozen microwaveable/barbecuable burgers   .69 each or 2/$1.00
Foreign barbecue sauce of questionable origin .29/bottle or 4 bottles/$1.00
Hot dogs of even more questionable origin        .99/pack or 5 packs/$4.00
Frozen imitation french fries                  .50/bag or 3 bags/$1.00

============EVERYTHING ELSE IN STORE BUY 3 GET 1 FREE===========

            You know where to find Rogelio's. Veer right out the driveway,
                    stagger about 500 yards, then cross the highway.
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Real Estate and Real Estate By-products

DOUBLEWIDE TRAILER SPACE FOR RENT
Now that all the rubble from the fire is cleared out, there's plenty of room in space #54 to put in a doublewide, and have a yard left over! Make all serious inquiries to Management. The phone number is on the sign at the driveway entrance.

TRAILERS FOR SALE OR RENT
If you lived here at Tinbox Acres with all of us, you'd be home right now. If you've got some cash in your fist and need a roof over your head, Call JR Johnson Realty TODAY at 1-800-JOHNSON.  Ask for JR.

DAMAGED TRAILERS FOR SALE, UNBELIEVABLY CHEAP!
The more damage sustained, the cheaper. Get a doublewide for the price of a cabover camper! Who says you can't sell a trailer that's been dropped sideways across a highway? Why, just last week, we sold one that skidded off a embankment and rolled into a gravel pit when our driver jackknifed the trailer-moving rig. We gots lots and lots of damaged merchandise, just waiting for YOU to take it home! Buy one before someone else does!
Call Trailertown NOW at 555-1313.

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