Lost and Found

LOST SANITY
Last detected right before the topless mudwrestling catfight in the duckpond. If found, please return to Welcome Wagon Willy in the nuthatch.

FOUND ALL SORTS OF LADIES' UNMENTIONABLES
Various types, sizes, and colors. Encrusted in mud and probably duckshit, too. Found along the shore of the duckpond while metal-detecting on Christmas Day. The bra-hooks and garter-snaps set off the metal detector like a mofo. Stop by space #81 to identify and claim.

For Sale

FUNNY PHOTOS
Shot with the nifty new digital camera Pop Feral done give me for Christmas, and printed on Arliss' new color printer in space #62. Available prints include a midget giving the finger, a bunch of fat ugly naked chicks covered in mud, Jesus passed out in the bushes wearing overalls, Elvis Presley sitting on our couch with my ma's velvet Elvis hanging on the wall behind him, and a hodgepodge of unflattering shots of almost all the neighbors. Inquire with Timmy Feral in space #68.

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BOOZAPALOOZA DRINK-TIL-YOU-DROP SALE!

Any liquor - Buy 5 get 1 FREE!

If dope supply dry out, DRINK! WHOLE BUNCH!
If to drink Sterno float your boat, Boozapalooza have that too!

Hung Phuc no give rat patoot what trailerpark goofball drink --
As long as trailerpark goofball buy beverage from Boozapalooza!

Boozapalooza always have booze, not dry out like dope supply!

Direction: Left at top of driveway, go 500 yard, cross highway.
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Real Estate and Real Estate By-products

Scratched and dented trailers -- CHEAP!
Singlewides, doublewides, fifth-wheel trailers, cabover campers! All styles and brands to choose from! We hired a new guy to be the lot gopher, and he's still learning how to park the rig and organize the merchandise. We sort of have a running joke going about his being like King Midas in reverse -- everything he touches (or crashes into) turns to shit. Get 25% off anything this guy has touched.
Call Trailertown NOW 555-1313.

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