Lost and Found

LOST PANTIES
Lime green in color, with white lace trim and industrial-strength, steel-belted-radial belly panel. Size XXL. Last seen in the mud on the shore of the duckpond. If found, return to Dot the crazy cat lady in space #8.

LOST EYEBROWS
Last seen on my face right before I lost a game of Quarters and passed out. If found, please return to Jingo the circus midget in space #99.

FOUND GREEN STRETCHY DOME TENT
Washed up on the shore of the duckpond after the ambulance hauled old lady Beadle away. Stop by space #81 to identify and claim.

For Sale

PHOTOS OF A UGLY COUPLE GOING AT IT ON A WASHING MACHINE
Numerous positions and angles. $5 each, or will trade for a six-pack. Inquire with Timmy Feral in the driveway.

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DOG DAY DOLLAR SALE AT BOOZAPALOOZA ENTIRE MONTH OF AUGUST

$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**$1**

MANAGER HUNG PHUC GO INSANE! EVERY ITEM IN STORE ONLY DOLLAR!

Direction: Stumble out driveway, careen left, stagger 500 yard, cross highway. Red sign out front.
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Real Estate and Real Estate Byproducts

TRAILER PARTS, TRAILER PIECES, WHOLE TRAILERS
Hot-Hot-Hot Sale for the Month of August! If you can brave the heat of our pitch-black asphalt lot, you could score the deal of a lifetime on a camper, trailer, singlwide, doublewide, or parts!
Call Trailertown NOW 555-1313.

STARTER FAMILY HOME IN GOOD CONDITION
Has decorative awnings, covered porch, fenced yard, and mature shade trees. Take a gander at the photo below. If you like what you see and you have a great big wad of cash in your fist, Call JR Johnson Realty, 1-800-JOHNSON

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