Lost and Found

LOST LIGHTERS
Last seen on the roof of our trailer. If found, please return to space #15.

LOST METH PIPE
Clear glass, with a two-inch stem ending in a bulb. Burnt on the bulb end, and lined on the inside with an off-white powdery substance. If found, return to BT in space #21.

FOUND TINY FLYING SAUCER
Crash-landed in the flowerbed next to my trailer. Either it's a toy flying saucer, or some ittybitty little space aliens burned up when their spaceship entered Earth's atmosphere. Stop by space #17 to identify and claim.

For Sale

FIREWOOD AND KINDLING
Will trade for beer and/or cigarettes. Stop by space #15 to see the merchandise and haggle over it.
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ROGELIO'S THANKSGIVING STOCK-UP SALE

Every item in the store 25% off!

Come on over to Rogelio's to stock up on all your must-haves for Thanksgiving, like cigarettes, beer, hooch, Cheez Whiz, Ritz crackers, popcorn, dynamite, and ammunition!

DON'T COME UP SHORT WHEN THE FAMILY SHOWS UP!

Directions: Stumble out the driveway, careen right, stagger 500 yards, stop, look both ways, then cross the highway. Blue sign out front.
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Real Estate and Real Estate Byproducts

CALLING ALL TRAILERMANIACS!
November is Trailermania month, and we're clearing the lot! Sizzling deals on cool trailers! Every camper, RV, fifth-wheel trailer, singlewide, and doublewide is priced to move! Don't miss out! Call Trailertown NOW 555-1313.

HOPE FOR THE HOPELESS
County mobilehome code enforcement got you down? Been ticketed for maintaining an uninhabitable residence here in the trailer park? Well, fret no more! There's plenty of abandoned, habitable trailers right here in the park! If your trailer recently got thrashed by tweekers, termites, or some other pestilence and you've got money burning a hole in your pocket, Call JR Johnson Realty, 1-800-JOHNSON

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