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Looking at me now you wouldn't know it, but a hour ago, I was laying face-up on the living-room floor of the trailer in a pool of my own sweat, fucked completely flat by a girl midget with huge tits. When I first tried to get up afterward, my knees wouldn't cooperate. I finally managed to get my legs underneath me, smoothed my hair back down, and I been happy-dancing all over the trailer park ever since. Nothing--and I mean nothing--is gonna kill this buzz, not even the cops. In fact, a whole fleet of cop cars could go twinkling down the driveway, and I would not run into my trailer and dive under my bed and lay there whimpering and quivering like I do every other time I spy a cruiser. The cops ain't coming after me today. I ain't done shit. Nothing the cops are interested in, anyways, ha-ha. It all went down when I walked into Fatty Daddy's trailer in space #88. There at the kitchen table sat the most gorgeous, perfectly formed girl midget. So perfect, in fact, I thought at first she was a hallucination because I'd just ate me a fistful of magical mushrooms. Midge weren't no hallucination, but it turned out the rainbow-colored aura radiating out from all around her was. I had a shitload of magical mushrooms in a quart-sized baggie, so naturally I passed it around the table. Everyone ate a fistful, including little Midge. The last person to get the baggie was Elvis, and he simply lifted the baggie and poured the pulverized remains down his gullet and washed it all down with a bottle of St Pauli Girl. Then things got crazy. Everyone in Fatty Daddy's trailer started tripping BALLS. Everything got really colorful, and nobody could stop laughing. Maddog Monson got hold of Willy's firesuit, firehat and goggles and climbed up on top of Willy's roof wearing it all. Maddog done a great impression of Willy, standing up there on the rooftop in space #38, threatening to jump off the trailer. Finally Maddog leaped off the roof and bellyflopped into a blue plastic kid-pool full of beer. Me and Midge tried to have a romantic interlude in the laundry room, but Virginia Beadle caught us and completely flipped out. She screeeeeeeeeamed and bolted out the door. Last me or Midge seen of her was just a cloud of heel-dust leading from the laundry room to the Beadle trailer in space #17. Later that day old lady Beadle rode to the nuthatch in the red ambulance, and nobody's seen hide nor hair of her since.
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