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MA FERAL'S TRAILER BURNS UP AND MELTS TO THE GROUND
Willy scores himself some Feral poontang


The dog days of summer may be over, but the summertime action here at Tinbox Acres is still going full-blast.

Ma Feral drank up all her dinner, but she was still hungry. There was still some packages of Ramen noodles that the church up the road had given to the Ferals, way back before the whole family got arrested. So Ma Feral got a pack of Ramen noodles and dumped them into a pan of boiling water to cook. Then she fell asleep in the reclining chair in her living room.

Six hours later, the trailer was all aflame. It seems while Ma Feral was snoozing in that chair, all the water boiled off of them Ramen noodles. The noodles dried out and crackled and eventually exploded into flames right there on the stove. Before all them noodles got incinerated to ashes, the kitchen curtains caught fire. From there the fire spread like, well, like wildfire.

Next thing you know, the smoke detector in the Ferals' trailer went off and Ma Feral ran out the front door. The curlers in her hair was all askew, and her eyes was raccooney from falling asleep with mascara on. But she ran outside anyways because her trailer was engulfed in flames.

While we was all running up the street to watch the Ferals' trailer burn down, Fatty Daddy trotted up to the pack carrying bags and bags of nifty rainbow-colored marshmallows in his arms. So we all grabbed twigs and sticks on the way to the fire and used 'em to roast the marshmallows on. Then the cops and firetrucks showed up. The firemen told us we're all a bunch of demented assholes for roasting marshmallows on a burning trailer. The firemen was just jealous because we didn't save no nifty rainbow-swirly marshmallows for them.

Welcome Wagon Willy came running to the rescue of Ma Feral.  Willy graciously offered to share his trailer with Ma Feral since hers burnt down and melted. Ma Feral accepted the offer. Arliss Feral was not invited to live with his ma and Willy. Arliss has temporary lodging, though, at least until Rudy is released from jail again. BT had a key to Rudy's place, so he let Arliss in.

Now you know why Ma Feral is all shacked up with Willy. That's also the reason Willy's running around the trailer park with a major case of the hi-pro-glow. He got laid. Big time. If you ain't heared the story right out of Willy yet, it's because you're deaf as a post. Willy tells anyone who will listen to him about how Ma Feral is so great in the sack, she makes his eyes spin like pinwheels.

When Ma Feral found out about how Willy has been stalking and badgering and trying to seduce Maudine to no avail for months, she done the sensible thing. She headed straight over to Maudine's place and stood right there outside her trailer and hollered about how she was going to kick Maudine's ass if she so much as LOOKED at Willy ever again. Then she heaved a empty bottle of Thunderbird into the side of Maudine's trailer to let her know she meant business. Ma Feral then staggered back across the street, into Willy's outstretched arms.

Old Willy and Ma Feral are now officially an item. Willy even squatted down on bended knee and popped the question. Ma Feral eagerly accepted. The happy couple ain't set a date just yet. Ma Feral still has to file for divorce, and Pop Feral's got to get out of prison so he can sign the divorce papers. It looks like the wedding day will be the day Pop Feral gets out of prison. Just a couple of lovebirds, that's what they are.

Willy must really, truly love Ma Feral a whole helluva lot if he's willing to put his life and limbs and flesh and bones on the line like that. Either that or he's got a kickass suit of armor hid in his trailer somewheres. Pop Feral's a good six and a half feet tall, he weighs in at about three bills, and he's threatened to smash and skin anyone who tries anything funny with his wife.

 

 


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