TREE-TRIMMING TWEEKERS DEMOLISH TREE, TRAILER, & SATELLITE DISH
Bad TV reception blamed

The photo above shows the trailer at sunrise,
and the photo below shows the same trailer at sunset
on the same day, after the tweekers got done with it.

You'd think by now we would have learned our lesson about hiring tweekers to do our yard work.

Last month, Buck and Buddy in space #15 were bitching about their satellite TV reception. A few of us figured it was that big tree next to their trailer that was fucking up the reception, because some of the branches overhanging the trailer was covering the satellite dish.

Eddie and Arliss in space #62 and Darrel Feral in space #19 volunteered to trim the tree while Buck and Buddy headed to the dive bar up the highway. Darrell borrowed BT's Skilsaw, Sawzall, and ladder to do the job. Darrell leaned the ladder against the trailer, then went to get some beer while Eddie and Arliss hauled the Sawzall and Skilsaw up onto the roof to start work.

Arliss grabbed the Skilsaw and went to work on the branches. Eddie grabbed the Sawzall and decapitated the satellite dish from its post. One thing led to another, and by the time Darrell returned with the beer, the satellite dish was nowhere to be found, the tree was reduced to a foot-high stump, and there was a pile of leaves and branches up at the front of the trailer, Somehow the satellite-dish post wound up too bent and mangled to attach the satellite dish to, if it ever turned up again. But it didn't.

Darrell spent the whole rest of the day trying to locate the missing satellite dish while Eddie and Arliss continued sawing and sanding and pulling the trailer apart. By the time the sun set, all that glorious yellow paint was sanded off the trailer, and a big hole had been hacked in the side. Them three tweekers had even pulled out some of Buck and Buddy's furniture and leaned it against the outside of the trailer. A big quilt that Buck's ma had sewed (before she died of alcohol poisoning) hung half-in and half-out of the trailer, making it resemble a giant metal dinosaur that someone had started gutting but didn't finish. Finally the three dipshits gave up and went home to kill the rest of the beer and fire up the meth pipe.

Virginia Beadle in space #17 seen the whole thing out her kitchen window. She thought Eddie, Arliss and Darrell had gone mental and was vandalizing Buck and Buddy's trailer, so old lady Beadle called the cops. The cops showed up, but after interviewing the three tweekers, decided no crime had been committed. Buck and Buddy's trailer was in such bad shape, though, that the cops had no other choice than to report the disaster to the county mobilehome enforcement department.

Some time after dark, Buck and Buddy returned to the trailer park to find their beautiful yellow trailer all sanded and sawed apart and eviscerated, and the satellite dish beheaded. Plus, there was a citation from county mobilehome enforcement scotch-taped to what remained of the kitchen window.

Let's all learn our lesson finally and remember not to ever hire tweekers to do yard work!

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