Harold in space #56 shares his recipe for a kickass Kitchen Window Slingshot. All you need is a bicycle innertube, a pair of scissors, a 8" x 12" square of leather (canvas works too), a spool of that super-thick thread leather is sewed with, a leather hand-sewing needle, two great big screws, and one great big screwdriver. Cut the innertube in half. Thread the leather needle with the leather thread. Sew one side of the leather to the end of one of the innertube halfs. The sew the other side of the leather to the edge of the other innertube half, forming a leather pouch in the middle. The use the screwdriver to affix the loose end of one of the innertube halfs to the left side of your kitchen window (preferably facing a offensive neighbor), then screw the loose end of the other innertube half to the right side of the window, with the leather pouch hanging directly in the middle. Use rotted fruit, dogshit, baggies full of lime Jello, pretty much anything that splats and/or stinks as ammo. Load the ammo into the pouch, pull the innertube back until it's either stretched to capacity or you hit the other wall, aim, and leggo.

Pop Feral says if you're pushing seven feet tall and three bills in weight, you probably should avoid marrying some scrawny little chick who won't take none of your shit. This goes double if she goaded you into the karaoke fight that landed you in a jail cell. Pop Feral came to this conclusion in that jail cell, where he's had plenty of time for retrospection and introspection and interrogation.

Them Feral boys, Arliss and Darrell, tell us the next time their parents get into a knock-down drag-out karaoke fight, they're gonna flush all their dope long BEFORE the cops show up.

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