Right before Rudy spaced out and went head-on into his Skilsaw, he shared his recipe for an outdoor meth cookout. Get some wood, dried grass and weeds, a rusty bucket, a Bic lighter, a shitpile of cold medication, some paint thinner, drain cleaner, charcoal starter fluid, iodine, sulfur, ammonium nitrate fertilizer, a pack of paper plates, oven mitts and a empty 55-gallon drum. Pile up the wood in a Indian tee-pee shape and shove the dried grass and weeds underneath for kindling. Mix all the aforementioned chemicals and cold medication together in the 55-gallon drum and store in the duckpond for now so's it don't blow up when the sun hits it. Light the woodpile and set the rusty bucket on top. Grab the 55-gallon drum full of chemicals and cold medication and dump it into the rusty bucket. Cook over open flame for two hours, or until bubbly and pasty. Skim out the meth paste and spread out the paste on paper plates and set aside to cool and crystallize. Put on the oven mitts, haul the rusty bucket to the shore, and throw it into the duckpond for rinsing and cooling. When the meth is all crystallized, scrape it off the plates, put in ittybitty ziplock baggies, and serve. Yummy!

BT reminds us all if we're going to follow Rudy's meth recipe, to be sure and hide way deep in the weeds and cook it way, way late at night to minimize our chances of being arrested for manufacture of a controlled substance. And be sure to wait 30 minutes after you're coherent again before you go running any dangerous machinery.

Timmy Radkin in space #47 says the soda machine is really easy to get open. All you need to do is steal a tire iron out of someone's yard, and you can have all the free sodas you want.

Beulah Radkin tells us if your kid eats or drinks too much, don't take him to the hospital for that bellyache. Them doctors and nurses and whatnot will call the authorities if you show up with a kid all overdosed on sodie-pop. It generates a shitpile of paperwork, they ask questions, then they threaten to take your kid (and his half of your welfare check) away for good. Anyways, it ain't pretty.

Dot in space #8 shares her secrets for having a great catnip garden. This is the perfect time to start planting. Buy a pack of catnip seeds from the nursery. Get some big muscle guy(s) to dig up some dirt around your trailer and stir a bunch of mulch into it with a shovel. Plant the catnip seeds in rows and hose down lightly. Here's the secret -- cover the whole thing with chickenwire. Thataway, the neighborhood cats won't dig up the garden and shit in it before the catnip even makes it out of the ground. Once the catnip plants are all growed in good and look like they could survive dozens of cats rolling in 'em, remove the chickenwire.

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