Darrell Feral got busted for stealing a car last month. Darrell is not in jail, nor was he even booked in the first place. Darrell stole one of the Dorque family's old beaters that was sitting outside their house and took it for a joyride. Normally stealing a car is a felony; it's called grand theft auto (GTA) and people do serious time for that shit. But in order for something to qualify as grand theft, it has to be worth more than any old beater in our trailer park. So Darrell was cited for petty theft auto (PTA) and released.




Police responding to a report of a female prowler found Welcome Wagon Willy all decked out in lipstick, a lace bra, thong, and stilettos, lurking around outside Pearline and Earline's trailer in space #40. When questioned by the police, Willy claimed he was just out there to batten down a loose screen on the twin old ladies' trailer. When asked about his apparel, Willy invoked his right to remain silent. No arrests were made.





Dick in space #45 tried to make a beer run on Rogelios Quick-E-Mart, but instead of running out the front door, he accidentally ran into the bathroom. Then he locked the door and Rogelio had to call a locksmith, and they cost triple to come out in the middle of the night like that. By the time the triple-charge locksmith got into the bathroom, Dick had drank all the evidence and smashed the cans and stashed them in the trashcan. Rogelio warned Dick that he's sick of this shit, and the next time he's calling the cops.




Police responding to a report of felony vandalism found Eddie, Arliss, and Darrell trying to fix Buck and Buddy's satellite dish in space #15. Upon arrival of the police, Virginia Beadle ran out of space #17 and made a witness statement. After determining that technically no crime was being committed, the cops escorted old lady Beadle back into her trailer and helped her get the lid off her tranks.

BT in space #21 was picked up for being under the influence of a controlled substance again. He forgot he'd loaned some tools to Eddie, Arliss and Darrell so they could fix a satellite dish, and he called to report them stolen. When the cops arrived, they found BT to be jittery, smacking his lips, unable to stand still or keep his eyes closed for more than a half-second at a stretch, and his pupils were totally blown. Arliss and Eddie pitched in and covered BT's bail.

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