It's against the rules to let your kids run around outside obviously drunk and smelling like a brewery. If you're gonna let your kids drink beer, even if it's just to entertain company, please keep 'em in your trailer instead of turning 'em loose in the driveway.

Peeping and stalking in the trailer park will earn you a night in the jail trailer under the watchful eye of Marshal Arvin. Peeping and stalking outside the trailer park will land you in jail for a month. Just ask Willy about that if y'all don't believe it.

Unsafe and insane building structures, such as inhabited boarded-up trailers, will no longer be tolerated here in the trailer park. Structures must at least LOOK like they ain't a humongous fire hazard, fer chrissakes.

Please dispose of your beverage containers properly. This means throw your beer bottles into a garbage can, or better yet, a recycle bin. Heaving your empty beer bottles at cars as they pass on the highway does NOT count as disposing of them properly.

Even though it ain't in the Tinbox Acres Rules and Regulations Handbook yet, it's still against the rules to go throwing great big rocks at someone's trailer unless they're having a party right next door and keeping you awake or something. Failure to babysit is not a good enough reason to start stoning a neighbor's trailer, whether or not that neighbor fathered your baby.

Fires and explosions are forbidden inside the trailer park, unless you're barbecuing something. And if you're barbecuing something, you better barbecue enough for everybody.

A shopping cart is not a high-speed ridey toy.

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