Let's all keep our trailers in good repair. If something breaks, fix it. If your sliding glass door falls off the track, put it back on the track instead of just nailing a board over the door hole. If something stinky starts boiling up under your trailer, please call the plumber. Let's not attract any more inspectors from the county mobilehome code enforcement division, shall we?

Please refrain from dealing dope out of your trailer. Go down to the duckpond to deal your shit.

Keep it quiet in the trailer park! Your neighbors are trying to sleep off hangovers. From now on, horn-honking in the trailer park will be punishable by a night in the jail trailer. This goes for your guests, too, at least the ones we can catch.

The garbageman only hauls away the stuff that's IN the dumpster. Anything you throw next to the dumpster stays there. Forever. Please ensure that all trash items go into the dumpster and not on the ground around it. This includes big shit, like couches and refrigerators and whatnot.

No squatting! You live in a trailer space, whether or not there's a trailer in that space, you pay space rent -- period. This is just a friendly reminder.

Children are now eligible to be locked up in the jail trailer when they go buckwild crazy and the rest of the trailer park gets sick and tired of their shit, just like adults from now on. And if a juvenile is caught drunk outside, the parents get to spend the night in the jail trailer right along with the kid, for turning a drunken minor loose for all of us to deal with.

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